Even God Gets Angery

The kids aren't out of school yet and I have already lost my cool with them. Last night, at the ballpark, Peggy and I had to work the announcer's booth. The kids were with us and we wanted to crown the lot of them. Jenna wanted to poke every button that was up there, Jessica whined the whole evening, and Jeremy thought he was in charge. 

 "Stop! Don't! Quit! Hands off! No! Quit that! Don't do that! Jeremy! Jessica! Jenna!" As you can see I didn't use very many complete sentences. When the evening ended, Peggy and I were exhausted. Don't get me wrong, we have great kids and I love them all, but they can still make me angry.

It is easy to get angry. Not just with the kids, but with many individuals and situations we face. Even Jesus got angry. When Jesus was turning over the money changer's tables, driving the animals out of the temple, and saying, "How dare you turn my Father's house into a market." He was not happy. In a recent book by Gary Chapman, he said something about anger that I never knew. In his book Anger: Handling a Powerful Emotion in a Healthy Way, he writes, "The bible often indicates that God experiences anger. The word anger is found 455 times in the Old Testament; 375 of these refer to God's anger. In fact, the psalmist said, 'God is angry with the wicked every day' (Psalm 7:11 KJV)." Hang on a second. If God is holy and if God is love how can God be angry? Most of us would say that anger is sin, so God must sin because he gets angry. Far from it. Let me state this in a different way and see if you understand. Because God is holy and because God is love, God necessarily experiences anger. It is God's holiness standing in the face of man's sin that makes him angry. It is God's love standing in the face of injustice that makes him angry. And God's response to his anger is never sinful.

The bible is pretty clear that anger is not a sin but how we handle our anger can lead to sin. Gary Chapman tells the story about a mother whose daughter was killed by a drunk driver. In her anger, she could have went after the man who killed her innocent girl. She could have stalked him down and ran over him like he did her daughter. Instead, Candy Lightner took her anger and began MADD, Mother's Against Drunk Drivers. It was her love for her daughter, her anger with the drunk driver, and the injustice of the court system that led to her action. She wanted to use her anger to make a difference and change the world. And she has.

What will we do with our anger? Gary Chapman gives us five steps to anger management.

1. Acknowledge to Yourself that You are Angry. Have you ever said, "I am not angry!" knowing full well that you are angry? I do that all the time. I know that God gets angry and I am made in His image so I will get angry. First I must admit it. It is not a sin to be angry and I need to understand this emotion.

2. Restrain your Immediate Response. Avoid the common mistake of venting and spend some time examining why you are angry. The immediate response often leads to sin. Count to a hundred or a thousand if you need to, but restrain your immediate response.

3. Locate the Focus of your Anger. Why are you angry? Were you truly wronged? How were you wronged? Did someone just let you down? How serious is this offense? Is this really something worth fighting about? Answering these questions may just help us to understand ourselves better. Maybe what happened was a trigger that you need to work on. Maybe the appropriate response is to examine what is going on inside of you.

4. Analyze your Options. Ask yourself the question, "Will my actions help or hurt the relationship?" "Am I acting out of love for the person who offended me or revenge?" If we need to confront, we need to do it in a constructive way. Anger can lead to destructive actions which are sin. We need to avoid actions that Jesus would not approve of. Think of the best way to handle this situation.

5. Finally: Take Constructive Actions. Sometimes the best course of action is to let the offense go. Pray about it and forget it. Jesus does that for your sin all the time. Release your anger and move forward. But, there are times that you must set the person who wronged you down and help them understand how you feel. There are times that they must know what they did wrong. This is a calm, thought through discussion that you have planed and prayed about.

There are times that I wonder how our angry reaction to our children affect their little lives. And not just our children, but how does our anger affect our marriage, our families, and our work environment. If anger is an issue for you, let me suggest purchasing the book by Gary Chapman Anger: Handling a Powerful Emotion in a Healthy Way. It is available on-line or in the book store at church. We all face times of anger, I am sure that a little biblical advice on this issue can help in many of your everyday situations.

In His Love,
Pastor Aaron

Keeping our Calm in a World that has Lost Theirs

I was talking with a friend of mine that works in the retail business the other day. She seemed a little frazzled while I was in the store, so I asked her what was wrong. "People!" She exclaimed, "People are so rude anymore, nothing is ever good enough, nothing is ever right. You can bend over backwards for someone and they won't even say thank you anymore. What is wrong with people now days?" Wow, what a question. What is wrong with people now days? It does seem that patience has gone out the door. People seem more demanding than ever. Road rage is definitely on the increase and etiquette has gone out the window. What is wrong with people?

My guess is that each of you who are reading this blog have had some trouble with people as of late. Maybe it was the lady that only filled your french fry box half full at the drive thru window because she was too lazy to reach over and put some more fries in the basket and press the button on the fryer to start the process of cooking up crispy goodness. But No! Instead she decides to just fill your fry container half full and stick it in the bag and hand it out the drive thru window because no one in their right mind would serve a half full fry container to a customer at the front desk out of fear of public humiliation. Instead she sticks it to you, loyal drive thru customer, and keeps you from enjoying your fill of its tasty goodness; requiring you to pull into a parking spot, go inside, and inform the french fry gal that the amount of fries in their large fry would fit nicely into the paper wrapper they use in their KID'S MEAL BOX! Glad nothing like that has ever happened to me. Okay, maybe it isn't easy to keep our cool these days. And there are times that I'm not sure if I am part of the problem or part of the solution.

There are a number of times during the course of any day that I can feel my face getting red, my blood pressure increasing, and the desire to say something not pleasant growing in my mind. How do we as Christians keep our calm in a world that has lost theirs? A scripture from Philippians often helps me when my fry container is only half full. Paul says, "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Philippians 4:8. Is it possible that a half full fry container is something to be thankful for? Could a half full fry container be a message from God? I have found that even in the most stressful situation, when I have been wronged greatly, there is something that I can be thankful for. I just need to take a moment and find out what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy in this situation. I have found that I can be part of the problem or part of the solution. I think Jesus worked at being an answer to the world's problems and not an instigator of more sin. Jesus says that if someone asks you to go a mile with them, go two. That means we need to allow ourselves to be used once in a while. That we don't always have to be right. That being a servant is greater than being in charge.

This week, let's try to put on the attitude of Jesus Christ. Instead of getting mad, let's get glad. Instead of being angry, find something to rejoice in. Instead of demanding your way, allow someone else to get theirs. Instead of adding salt to someone's wound, put a little salve on it and give them a bandage while you are at it. Maybe a group of calm, caring Christians can begin to change the attitude of the world.